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Thursday, April 25, 2013

Writing Your Own Story

"Life is a book
and there are a thousand pages
I have not read."
--Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Princess


Genre: YA Historical Fiction, Paranormal
Publisher: Margaret K. McElderry Books, 568 pages
Publication Date: March 19th, 2013
Source: Bought...duh
Previous Reviews in this Series: Clockwork Angel & Clockwork Prince

Goodreads Description

Danger and betrayal, secrets and enchantment in the breathtaking conclusion to the Infernal Devices trilogy

Tessa Gray should be happy - aren't all brides happy?
Yet as she prepares for her wedding, a net of shadows begins to tighten around the Shadowhunters of the London Institute.
A new demon appears, one linked by blood and secrecy to Mortmain, the man who plans to use his army of pitiless automatons, the Infernal Devices, to destroy the Shadowhunters. Mortmain needs only one last item to complete his plan. He needs Tessa. And Jem and Will, the boys who lay equal claim to Tessa's heart, will do anything to save her.

My Thoughts

Uuuum...this is really...really hard to write. This book legitimately destroyed me emotionally for days. I have never had a book hangover like this. I am still a little shaky and aching inside my chest. You guys...this book was so.good. I had such high expectations for this book. I read Clockwork Angel and Clockwork Prince for a second time each prior to reading this and the entire process wore me out. The emotional impact these books had on me is just unreal. Because of how excited I was for this book I pretty much shunned Twitter and refused to read any news feed from the day it came out until I finished it because I was TERRIFIED somebody would tweet the ending... and that totally happened to another blogger, so I had to just not go on. I would have seriously cut a bitch if this book was ruined for me. My first tweet post-finishing was "Crying like a child, a little nauseous, and slightly lightheaded...symptoms of a good book." By the Angel I was EXHAUSTED! I felt like I ran a marathon! Oh my gosh. AND  not only did I cry on and off for a good portion of the book but for a good 2 hours after finished I would randomly burst into tears. I was a MESS! I felt like I had the emotional hell beat out of me...but it felt so good in the best way. So here I go...

SPOILERS FOR FOR ALL THREE BOOKS HERE...IF YOU HAVE NOT READ CLOCKWORK PRINCESS DO NOT READ THIS...I WILL SPOIL THE ENTIRE BOOK FOR YOU...YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED...
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Ok, so for the second review in a row I have to talk about spoilers. I feel as if I will legit implode and will not do my own thoughts justice without venting and freaking out about all the things I loved and were frustrated by.

Overall, LOVE LOVE LOVED the book!!! I could not read it fast enough. I could not put it down. I felt intense anxiety the entire time while reading it. I am a Will fan. I was just so freaking nervous the entire time because I wanted so badly for him to be happy...AND BE WITH TESSA!! Holy freakin' hell, I've gotta talk about this right now and really it is the only thing I want to talk about. But wait, ok, I'll talk about the other stuff first. I love that this book is about love. Love of friends and the family that you make your own whether or not they are blood related to you. Sacrifice and anguish of being honorable. Thinking of the greater good and of others always before yourself. This book had it all. Which is where much of the anxiety came from. These characters are so pure of spirit and beautiful that your heart aches for them to be okay and come out on top. Oh it is just so. effing. amazing.

Alright...let's get to the good stuff. Like I said before, this book and all the others are about love...and the love story that dominates the entire series? Will and Tessa...and Jem. I am a Will fan. I fangirl for Will. I wish he existed in real life. I adore beyond words Will. With that said, I am being 100% honest and objective with some of my next points. These books and the love story is about Will and Tessa. Sorry.Not.Sorry. 

Will rescues Tessa. They both fall absolutely in love with each other. And because of Will's "curse" he cannot show her his feelings. He is HORRIBLE to Tessa...yet she still cannot stop loving the good she knows is inside him. What does that say about them? True love? Absolutely. Without a freakin' doubt. These two just keep coming back to each other time after time after time. The narrative and entire storyline is DOMINATED by Will and Tessa and Tessa and Will. To say otherwise is an absolute lie. It revolves around them. And furthermore, look at the ending of Clockwork Prince. Tessa is torn apart that she cannot tell Will she loves him. She agreed to marry Jem ONLY BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT WILL WOULD NEVER BE HERS. She settled. Seriously. If you try and argue differently you are lying to yourself. 

I love Jem. Really, I do. He is a wonderfully kind and beautiful character. But to try and ship Jem and Tessa together over Will and Tessa is an absolute joke to me. Do I think Tessa loves Jem? Yes, absolutely. Do I think Tessa loves Jem in a romantic and passionate way that would lead to a life of happiness and children? No. I see Jem and Tessa as best friends. Tessa and Jem complement each other. They are compatible. But Tessa and Will...there is a fire there that is undeniable and unparalleled to any other relationship. They get each other. They call each other out. They banter. They are playful. They laugh. They are perfect for each other. You just don't see that with Tessa and Jem, I'm sorry but you don't. 

If Jem had been a healthy man without the disease killing him, I believe Tessa would not have hesitated to break off her engagement and be with Will. I'm calling a spade a spade here. Pity was involved. And I am sure I am going to catch a lot of heat for this but seriously guys, it's true. Think about it. AND I know that the author herself has said that Jem and Will share souls because they are parabati and that Tessa does love both boys equally...I call bullshit. Total bullshit. While I agree that not every person only has one great love, you can have many, but I just don't see the equality in the love Tessa has between the two boys. It's just not there. They are still very separate, very distinct people. I think it is a bit insulting to try and share them or clump them together. They are two different people with many unique and distinct emotions and feelings. And when push comes to shove, gun to Tessa's head, she is picking Will. SHE SHOVED HER HAND IN A FIRE TO DULL THE EMOTIONAL PAIN SHE FELT WHEN SHE REALIZED WILL LOVED HER AND SHE COULD NOT SAY IT BACK.  

With that said. I loved the ending. It was absolute perfection. It was exactly how I wanted it to end and it was beautiful. The beginning of the epilogue was both enchanting and heartbreaking because we hear about the rest of Will and Tessa's life together...and then we get to the last few pages...and surprise! Jem is no longer a Silent Brother and he is mortal...oh and look at that, let's not forget Tessa is immortal and now she can be with Jem and have a life with him for a while...cop.out. Serious cop out and it kind of hurt my heart. I have since recovered my initial annoyance but again, I'm still calling bullshit. Did I want Jem to have his happily ever after? YES! Of course, but I thought the Silent Brothers was it. He didn't die and I really thought that once he saw what Tessa and Will have together, he would have realized that what he and Tessa had is nothing compared to that. I really think Tessa more talked herself into wanting Jem than actually feeling it. The passion is just not there between them.

Lastly. I am speaking to Team Jem when I write this and try to be objective...Team Will I'm gonna need you to back me up. Picture the end of the book with the roles reversed. Will as the Silent Brother or dead, and Tessa left with Jem...she would have been absolutely destroyed. She would not have recovered from losing Will. She wouldn't have. She would not have had the same happiness with Jem as she did end up having with Will. Seriously, you're kidding yourself if you think otherwise. Look at the ending of Clockwork Prince and tell me she would pick Jem over Will. She wouldn't. Even when she was engaged to Jem she always sought out Will in the room. *sigh* I just wish the last 6 pages didn't happen. No, I actually just with they wouldn't have kissed. I really am okay with it the more time I get away from the book. Because I know in my heart her true love was Will. 

Wow. See?!? I told you, emotional wreck. I KNOW everything about this is just rambling and emotions and NONE of what I said is meant in a negative way towards the author it is just what I feel. Obviously Cassandra Clare is a phenomenal writer or I would not be feeling so acutely about the book. I loved it. It was one of the best endings to a series I have ever read. The more I think, the more I am ok with the epilogue I just HAD to vent my initial feelings because it just bothers me that people can say she loves them equally. You can't. You can love them differently and that is what I think Tessa does. 

*Deep breath* For serious. I love the Infernal Devices. It is a series I would recommend to anyone and everyone. It is poignant and so emotionally raw you cannot help but become absolutely captured by this world. I was in a funk for a good 3 days after reading it. I do not really ever get book hangovers and after finishing I had no desire to start another book. Oh gosh, I'm gonna start crying again just thinking about it...argh!! But for real. I would love to discuss this book with anyone!! Find me on Twitter or we can gchat, let me know!! Peace and love. 

3 comments :

  1. Ohmygod YES!! I finished Clockwork Princess last month at around 1 in the morning and cried until 4am. I can't sleep no matter how many times I told myself to get over it and rest. Even after a few days just thinking about it makes me teary all over again and if I let it, I'm pretty sure I'll bawl. I'm still incapable of writing a coherent review about it *emotional overload* :(

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  2. There was definitely crying for me. HOWEVER, I didn't love the epilogue. I just felt like it was a bit of a cop out. I did give the book 5 stars, b/c this is my FAVORITE series and I just love Clare's writing. BUT I just felt like the ending was put there to satisfy everyone. At first I loved it, but the more I brooded over it, the more upset I was. This is the only series I can see myself rereading.

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  3. hahahhaa... first of all... favorite line of the entire review: "By the Angel I was EXHAUSTED!"

    I can feel your passion in this review... hahaha like serious hardcore passion and i love it! I don't think I've ever texted anyone about a series like I did this one. There were so many MOMENTS and EMOTIONS that just couldn't be kept to myself!! I agree on the ending..... I'd rather him stayed a Silent Brother and the last scene just been the two of them meeting up on their annual visit. That would have been closure enough for me. Heck, I'd rather her have ended up with Magnus Bane! I get the whole parabatai thing... and that Will would have wanted Tessa to be happy once he was gone, but really????

    Okay, don't get me started on this again. We can rant at BEA!!

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