The Fallout of Staying

"You don't share me.

You own me."

--Gayle Forman, Where She Went

Genre: YA Contemporary

Publisher: Dutton Juvenile, 264 pages

Publication Date: April 5th, 2011
Source: Library...soon to purchase :)

Find On Goodreads

Goodreads Description

It's been three years since the devastating accident . . . three years since Mia walked out of Adam's life forever.

Now living on opposite coasts, Mia is Juilliard's rising star and Adam is LA tabloid fodder, thanks to his new rock star status and celebrity girlfriend. When Adam gets stuck in New York by himself, chance brings the couple together again, for one last night. As they explore the city that has become Mia's home, Adam and Mia revisit the past and open their hearts to the future-and each other.

Told from Adam's point of view in the spare, lyrical prose that defined If I Stay, Where She Went explores the devastation of grief, the promise of new hope, and the flame of rekindled romance.

My Thoughts

Oh Mia, oh-my-uh. Holy crap I don't even know where to start...Oh yeah...IF YOU HAVEN'T READ IF I STAY YOU NEED TO DO 2 THINGS. FIRST, STOP READING THIS DUE TO SPOILERS AHEAD. SECOND, GO READ IF I STAY IMMEDIATELY. K, I'm good now. 

So I finished If I Stay and I had Where She Went literally sitting right next to me in anticipation of needing the next book immediately. I have these moments sometimes, not often, where I'm super smart and think ahead :) So after I finish If I Stay, I read the description of Where She Went. My reaction....WHAT?!?!!?!?!? It's been 3 friggin' years and they are not together?!? What the hell is this bullshit!?!? My heart broke a little harder after reading this. Oh my word. I could not imagine a world where Adam and Mia were not together after the end of If I Stay. I felt jolted. I felt empty. I felt so sad. *sigh* Guess I'll just start reading it...

...And holy crap. I thought I felt intense emotional angst in the first book, this book is just as amazing in that way. This book is told from Adam's perspective and it is just so raw. To say he is devastated is the understatement of the year. This man is broken. I mean...broken. His internal struggles and monologues broke my heart to pieces. His flashbacks and stories gut you. I looooooved If I Stay. I got Mia. I understood her. I felt with her. But this decision to drop Adam like a bad habit, I just couldn't understand. I wanted to identify with her but only getting Adam's perspective helped me see his side of it too. She was not the only one who lost something that day. This topic is discussed farther in the book and it is so true. While she has the monopoly on pain, Adam hurt too, and the author (through Adam and Mia) asks us, 'Who was there to hold your hand?' Dyyyying. So honest and true and just amazing!

I loved how certain chapters opened up with song lyrics that Adam wrote. GENIUS!! Totally gave us even more perspective into his mind and what he was going through. I, like him, was in shock the entire book. Like, what happened to them that made them get to the places they are today? Even as he's re-telling the story I could not believe it. I mean, c'mon, this is Adam and Mia! His love saved her. It kept her here...which we find out is some of the problem. I will not delve into too much detail but the ending of this book is one of the best I have EVER read. The emotions, the confessions, the feelings, the honesty and agony of all that was lost. I cannot say it any better than that except this is a book that makes you feel. It keeps you thinking about it long after you've finished reading it. And the end...THE END!! The last legit paragraph or two...dying. Crying. Dying. Hoping somebody will recreate me. 

I feel like I am missing huge chunks of things I want to talk about but everything I loved in If I Stay is even better in Where She Went. The writing is beyond real. Beautiful. Poignant. Heartfelt. It is all there and more. I loved how If I Stay dealt with one type of agonizing loss while in the same story but a different context, Where She Went deals with a whole other kind of pain and loss. I loved how Forman took one story and molded into so many different layers and facets. This story evolved and grew into so much more than an objective and horrific car crash. The writing is brilliant. No other words.

I hope you have read both these books by now, but just in case you have not GO read them now. They are beautiful. You will not regret it. As we know I am not drawn to contemporaries and these books changed my mind. I must read more. *sigh* So good. So just incredibly...good :)